Federal Hill may be Providence’s Little Italy, but there’s a little Italy floating through the Providence River downtown. It’s a gondola. Yes, Providence. Not Venice. To be a gondolier in Providence, however, there are a few rules:  You get an Italian name, you memorize a repertoire of songs — in Italian, of course — and you log at least 20 hours of training on the water.

If you prefer riding a gondola to serving as its captain, then the rules are much simpler: You merely sit back, relax and enjoy. In my case, you also take copious notes. If you’re lucky, your boat may be helmed by the most seasoned gondolier of La Gondola, the company offering the Venetian excursions. That’s Matthew “Marcello” Haynes, also advertised as “Il Boss” on the business’s website.