I’m brapping around Manhattan on a Centenary Edition Moto Guzzi V7 bedecked in charcoal and olive-green livery. An 850cc V-twin which makes me want to hit the Swiss countryside and find some barbed-wire fence to jump, à la Steve McQueen in The Great Escape.

Sadly, the proxy has to be Park Avenue; a venue with its own inherent risks, challenges, and dangers. Madcap taxi drivers, lawless Uber drivers, mafiosi-pot-hole-riddled road surfaces, and entitled a—holes in overpowered German cars fit for the autobahn devoid of respect for other road users around them. I’m not convinced jumping the barbed wire fences is more dangerous.